This is the official website of Danny King, author of The Burglar Diaries, and it’s all free – at least until he can figure out some way of making money out of it. There’s not much to it, to be honest, just a few bits and bobs you might find interesting if you liked the books. So enjoy, and don’t waste your time looking for porn because there isn’t any.
THE DK DIARIES:
LATEST NEWS & DEVELOPMENTS
22/12/09 *** NOW JUST £5.99***
That's right, the headline says it all. More Burglar Diaries is now priced just £5.99 through lovereading.co.uk. Those smooth-talking Geordie Arthur Daley salesmen at Byker Books have wangled an almighty discount from the UK's no.1 literary website, so now there's no excuse not to buy a copy – unless of course you hate me, my books and everything I stand for. In which case what are you reading my website for? To see me fall flat on my arse and fail, huh! Well fair enough. But for those of you I didn't used to date or go to school with, click HERE to find out more.
08/11/09 RIGHTS SAID FRED
In response to several recent emails, I've drawn up a list of the rights available to my various books, scripts and scribblings, from publication rights, television, film, stage, audio, large print and radio etc. These can be found on my contact page or by clicking here. If you wish to enquire after a certain right, please drop me a line at the usual address. And if you wish to acquire a particular right to a particular book, I accept all currencies, including pounds, euros, dollars, blood diamonds, heroin and filipino ladyboy child brides (in units of ten only please).
31/10/09 MORE BURGLAR DIARIES
After two months away from the office, I'm back on-line, so apologies if I've not responded to any of your emails over the last few weeks, but life kind of got in the way. We've now shipped out to the cathedral city of Chichester, so for those of you stalking me, I should be a lot easier to find as the town's only got one Wetherspoons. Which brings to my first bit of pub-related business; MORE BURGLAR DIARIES is will be available to buy on Amazon.co.uk from November 9th, thanks to the world's hardest publishers, Byker Books. Priced £7.99 and delivered for FREE with Amazon's Super Saver Delivery scheme, the book's now much more affordable than when I was punting it out myself, so my sincerest thanks go to the Byker lads. So, to mark the occasion (and this is the pub bit), we will be launching the book on Saturday, November 14th, in The Buck and Bell in Banbury, Oxfordshire from 2pm to 4pm (50-52 North Bar Street, OX16 0TH). Copies will be available, so will drinks and peanuts presumably, and I'll be there in the flesh along with big Andy and a pint pot full of empty pork scratching wrappers, so if you're free that afternoon, come along and say hello. More details can be found on Byker Books' website, or on their Facebook page, if you're one of them cyber types.
06/09/09 ROCK N' ROLL PUB TOURS
Excuse the blatant plug, but my esteemed mate, Kev Molloy, is one of London's best official tour guides and he's just established a walking tour of Soho pubs with infamous Rock 'n' Roll connections. Kev will take you around seven or eight pubs of note and dazzle you with an array of anecdotes. It's the perfect way to celebrate a social-occasion, birthday-bash, or plain old jolly up.
The cost is £120 per group (so 20 people £6 each – very cheap).
Phone 070 222 12345 or e-mail info@yourlondontours.com for more details! And tell your friends. Tell them old Kev's alright by me. Kev also does loads of other fantastic walks and tours for party groups, and can collect smaller parties in his London Black Cab, so visit his website www.yourlondontours.com and take a look for yourself. And because we used to work together, he's got lots of dirt on me too. Hence the free advert.
04/09/09 GOING OFF-LINE
I'll be off-line for the next few weeks while me and Jeannie move house. The website will still be up and running but they'll be nobody home to answer questions or satisfy requests for naked JPEGs of myself. After 17 years of living in The Big Smokey Apple, we're upping sticks and moving to the south coast. Chichester to be precise. I should be back on-line soon enough and I'll try to check my emails when I can, but if you drop me a line and I don't get straight back to you, it's because I can't find which box I packed the internet in. Cheers.
29/06/09 IT'S A REET GOOD READ
Football might be more popular now than it's ever been before, but for those following the black & white stripes of Newcastle United it's been a tough last half a century. One such long-suffering fan is my esteemed friend, Andy Rivers of Byker Books fame, who attempts to off-load some of his own private misery onto the book-buying public through his excellent publication, I'm Rivelino. Charting a life of despair, hope and then yet more despair, Andy takes us on a tour of the pies and lows, and through 30 years of shattered dreams (I've got news for you Andy, it ain't getting any better). Forward by former Magpie Lee Clarke and priced £6.99, I'm Rivelino – A Life of Two Halves is available from either Amazon or Byker Books from August 1st (pre-order now). It's the book Fever Pitch was trying to be and packed with anecdotes and incidents that fans of all teams will be able to identify with – except obviously fans of Brazil, Man Utd, Liverpool, Arsenal etc.
12/06/09 RADGEPACKET THREE
Yes that's right, Radgepacket – Volume Three is upon us and it's harder than ever before, mixing it up on the shelves and beating the crap out all those high-brow, snooty anthologies who dare look at its ISBN number in a funny way. Featuring stories from some of Britain's best unsigned authors, Radgepacket's pages are packed with tales of giant rats, bent politicians (no these are two separate stories), teenage car thieves and violent vigilantes. There's even a story from me about the birds and the bees, so don't delay, buy yours today, either direct from Byker Books (FREE P+P) or from Amazon. What else are you going to do with £5.99? Have your moat cleaned?
02/06/09 LOVE SPLASH!
Jeannie and I did an interview with The Daily Mail recently in connection with Blue Collar's release. In case you missed it, you can check out the article on-line by clicking wherever I eventually decide to put the link or by rooting around on The Daily Mail's website. It's in the Femail section. I particularly liked some of the comments afterwards, my favourite being from Chris in Jersey, who said of Jeannie's claim that she only lets Charlie watch TV for 15 minutes at a time: "That's ridiculous, he can only watch half of even the shortest programmes!"
–
Chris, Jersey.
I'm with you Chris. How's he meant to get into The Wire at that sort of rate? Perhaps I'll put the link HERE.
30/05/09 DAILY MAIL MAN
Jeannie and I were interviewed by The Daily Mail last week in connection with Blue Collar's release, so if you're a regular reader, look out for us in the Femail section. I'm not sure when the article will go in, but I'll post the details here as soon as I know. All very exciting to be in the newspaper, though that allegation about the £1,014 I claimed for secretarial work was wholly spurious. That claim was entirely within HM Revenue & Customs rules and a genuine business expense. I just got confused and accidentally sent them a grand's worth of receipts for oven chips and Cillit Bang, that's all.
10/05/09 BURGLAR BOYS
As a great patron of the arts (the piss arts), it's incredibly satisfying to see my work influencing future generations, therefore I was delighted to discover that 17-year-old college student Will Samuel had made a short film based on The Burglar Diaries as part of his Media course work. The budding director was tasked with shooting the opening five minutes of a theoretical full-length feature and ended up creating an exciting and funny intro interspersed with stylish credits. Richard Brutan and Lewis Chapman star as Bex and Ollie, while Will adapted the screenplay himself. All the boys are now doing two years in HMP Ashfield and good luck to them too. Check out their endeavours on You Tube by clicking the links.
09/05/09 BLUE COLLAR IN SHOPS
If you don't already know (and why should you unless you were stalking me or married to me or both) my next book will be in all good bookshops as of June 4th. Don't panic, there should be more than enough copies to go around, or you can just do what I normally do when one of my favourite authors brings out a new book and wait until somebody makes a film of it (then download it for free off the internet). Blue Collar is a slight departure from the beaten track for me in that nobody gets killed or robbed in it, but it's still in my usual style with silly gags, sub-GCSE spelling and English-as-a-second-language-style grammar. Published by Serpent's Tail and priced £7.99, unless you're able to find in on the 3 for 2 tables. If not, do us a favour and look in the back of the shop for it, grab a big handful and stick them out front for us will you? That should help shift the fucking thing. Cheers.
09/05/09 HOLLYWOOD HENCHMEN
I'm pleased to report I've just optioned the film rights of my future novel, The Henchmen's Book Club, to DM Productions in Los Angeles, USA. The book's finished, though not due for publication any time soon, but DM's exec, David Matalon, was keen to see an early draft after he also optioned School for Scumbags. Those are all the details I have for the moment, except of course how much I got paid, but I ain't posting that, so watch this space for further developments.
10/03/09 SCUMBAG WRITERS
The Hollywood producers of the eagerly anticipated movie adaption of School for Scumbags (eagerly anticipated by me and my bank manager that is) David Matalon and Andy Vajna have hired Aaron Rapke and Stewart Kaye to write the screenplay. The L.A. duo Rapke and Kaye co-wrote the short film, The Money Shot, which Rapke also directed, and are allegedly so hot they need to wear oven gloves just to jangle their change. I'll post more details as I learn them.
16/02/09 WHAT DOES HE KNOW?
Fans of pompous self-righteous arseholes with over-inflated opinions of themselves may be interested to know they can catch me speaking on World Book Day (the rest of the time I simply rant). I will be appearing at Queen's Park Library on Wednesday March 4th, from 6.30pm, with the lovely Rebecca Gray from Serpent's Tail, to talk about the trials and tribulations of getting published. The event is free and will last about an hour and a half. And who knows, they may even lay on a box of wine and some cheese straws or something. I always take my own in case not. You can reserve a place by phoning the library on 020 7641 4579 or by emailing queensparklibrary@westminster.gov.uk. So, if this appeals to you then please do come along and say hello. If not, can you tape MasterChef for me?
05/02/09 RADGEPACKET 2 – NOW WITH EVEN MORE PUNCTUATION!!!
After the knock out success of Radgepacket – Volume 1, those enterprising boys from BykerBooks are back up off the canvas with Radgepacket – Volume 2. Packed with great stories from the seamier side of life, Radgepacket is the perfect showcase for some of Britain's premier unsigned authors. So, for all those interested in taking a detour off the beaten mainstream, this is the tome for you. There's even an interview with, and story from, the best-selling literary phenomenon that is Sheila Quigley, so if that's not worth £5.99 of your PayPal tokens (includes FREE P&P) I don't know what is. Available direct from BykerBooks at http://bykerbooks.co.uk/ourbooks.aspx or from Amazon.co.uk from March 2nd, 2009. Pre-order now. Oh, and I forgot to mention I've got a previously unpublished story in there too. I knew there was some reason I was writing this news piece.
22/01/09 FILM CLUB
Here's a quick unapologetic plug for a movie that's been released this week. 'Clubbed' is on general release across the UK and stars Mel Raido as a born-again hard man who turns to security work on the doors of some of Birmingham's toughest clubs. Set in the 1980s, it has a wicked soundtrack (as you'd expect from an era that brought us Now That's What I Call Music), some brutal violence and cars that spew out exhaust fumes you could hang your hat on. Check out a trailer at www.clubbedthemovie.com. I've seen it and it's well worth a trip to the cinema. Now to declare my interest. The company that produced Clubbed, Formosa Films, have bought the rights to my book, The Pornographer Diaries, and are in the process of adapting it for the big screen. Watch this space. Actually don't. Go and watch Clubbed instead.
22/01/09 MILO THE MOVIE
I'm pleased to announce that I've just optioned the film & television rights of Milo's Marauders and Milo's Run to my good friend and KFC enabler, Gary Beadle. As you may or may not know, Gary played Weasel in Thieves Like Us and Godfrey in the stage version of The Pornographer Diaries when it went to Edinburgh. Now he's going for the DK hattrick by playing Milo on the big screen. It's very early stages, obviously, but Gary is looking to make two movies, one of each book, and is in the process of raising the money as we speak. So if anyone's got a couple of spare million that's cluttering up the house, I know he'd love to hear from you.
16/12/08 FREE THE THIEVES LIKE US 6?
Earlier this week I was emailed by a fan of the Thieves Like Us. This came as something of a surprise to me as I didn’t realize Thieves Like Us had any fans. They asked if there were any plans to release the show on DVD and drew my attention to a message that phoenix-192 had posted on imdb.com’s message board. It reads as follows:
"If anyone is interested, I recently e-mailed the BBC about a possible DVD release and this is the reply I got:
Thanks for your e-mail regarding Thieves Like Us. I'm glad you enjoyed the programme. I'm currently unaware of any plans to release this series. However, if you'd like to make a suggestion for its release as a DVD, you can put it in writing to the Programme & Acquisitions Department who're responsible for the commercial DVD release of BBC programmes.
Please write to:
Programming & Acquisitions Dept
2 entertain
33 Foley Street
London
W1W 7TL
Please note that there must be adequate public interest before a release can be arranged."
I really enjoyed Thieves Like Us so I will be writing to call for a DVD release. If you know anyone who liked this, get them to write in!! – phoenix-192"
Like BBC matey above, I don’t know of any plans to release Thieves Like Us, but if anyone would like support phoenix-192 in their campaign to get the show a DVD release, they won’t hear me going mental in protest. And in case you’re wondering, no, phoenix-192 isn’t me or Jeannie.
Bex and Ollie chat with the Programming & Acquisitions Director about a mutually beneficial release deal
19/11/08 3:AM INTERVIEW
Anyone interested in all things me (ie. me, my wife, and the man from the Inland Revenue) might be interested to be directed to an interview I did with those fine upstanding fellas at 3:AM Magazine. My thanks to Andrew Stevens for putting the questions to me and for not muttering "wanker" under his breath when he heard my answers.
Check it out and a lot more besides at www.3ammagazine.com/3am/king-of-the-wild-frontier/
05/11/08 HAVE SOME OF THAT!
I'm a great admirer of folks with get-up and go, particularly when that same get-up and go allows me to lazily ride their coat tails. So it is with great pleasure that I bring you news of Radgepacket – Volume 1, an anthology of short fiction from some of Britain's most promising unknowns (as well as a couple of barely knowns like myself who need the exposure). It's packed with tales of armed robbers, funeral frolics, sexy shenanigans and drunken escapades and is brought to you by the boys from bykerbooks.co.uk, a bunch of surprisingly literate lager louts from the wrong side of the library who got fed up with wading through a mountain of chick-lit and worthy-unoriginals in their hunt for something to read and finally did something about it. Published 17th November, 2008, this strictly edition publications costs only £5.99, including FREE P&P, and can be bought on-line by clicking here. It's what Christmas stockings were invented for. Visit http://bykerbooks.co.uk/ourbooks.aspx.
03/09/08 TEN THOUSAND PICTURES OF YOU
If you managed to catch Thieves Like Us or have ever read the acknowledgements of any of my books, you'll know that my brother Robin is a fine up-standing thespian of the noblest traditions (ie. he's out of work). But unlike the vast majority of unemployed actors, Robin hasn't spent his time sobbing over a silent phone, wanking into a full-length mirror or loitering around the bogs on Hampstead Heath (at least, I've never seen him up there), Robin has spent his time making some rather excellent movies of his own. His debut, the live-action animated short, Ten Thousand Pictures of You, has been scooping up awards and has played in festivals all over the world, from California to Hiroshima. It's only three minutes long, so you can watch it free online at www.vimeo.com/2554266. Check it out, it's great.
03/09/08 HOP SKIP AND JUMP TO NO.1
If there's one thing I'm good at (and some might argue there's not) it's my ability to be the last to climb aboard any sort of trend. Like the FA refusing to send teams to the first World Cup tournaments, or the English half of the Eurostar route only completing its high speed rail link fifteen years after the Tunnel was opened, I fear change and resist it at all costs (I'm typing this on a ZX Spectrum). That said, I'm going to stick my neck out and get in on one particular act from the ground floor. Henry's Carpet Skip is an up-and-coming band with the world at its feet and a rather unsuccessful writer clinging to its coat tails. Their debut single, Step Into The Fight, is out now and you can hear an extract and find out more about this plucky Sheffield combo at www.henryscarpetskip.com.
21/08/08 BLUE COLLAR DEAL SIGNED
I'm pleased to announce that the next book of mine to be published will be 'BLUE COLLAR'. I've just signed the contract with Serpent's Tail and the book will be available in all the usual places, bookshops, on-line, recycling bins etc, from June 2009. It's a bit of a wait I'm afraid but if you get drunk every day from now until then, you'll find the months and weeks pass by in no time. It's what I'm planning on doing. BLUE COLLAR is a bit of a departure from my normal genre, in that it's not a crime story, but it's still in my usual style (ie. crass jokes, casual swearing, implausible plots and primary school punctuation), so if you've enjoyed my past books, you should enjoy this one – particularly if you've ever tried to bridge the social twain.
05/06/09 OUR FRIENDS IN THE NORTH
A brand-new never-been-seen-before Burglar Diaries story has been published by a dynamic new on-line POD publisher called Byker Books Industrial Strength Fiction. You can find The Man With No Life on the Radgepacket page of their site, as well as an interview I did with the boys in Radgepacket Interviews. The chaps have great ambitions for Byker Books and I think they¹re off to a flying start, so check them out and keep an eye on them at the following address: www.bykerbooks.co.uk.
09/05/08 BIG GREEN BOOKSHOP *EVENT*
I’ll be doing a reading and giving an informal chat (ie. no preparation) at
the Big Green Bookshop in Wood Green on June 9th as part of the chaps’ Crime
Week so do pop along if you get the chance. The Big Green Bookshop, Unit 1,
Brampton Park Road, Wood Green, London N22 6BG. The event starts at 6.30pm
and will also be attended by Cathi Unsworth, a smashing friend of mine who
wrote such corking reads as The Not Knowing and The Singer. I’ll be sober
until at least 7.05pm, so hope to see you there if there’s nothing good on
the box that night.
23/04/08 FORTHCOMING UPDATES
I've finally got around to updating my Forthcoming Publications page to show
what's happening with what, so take a butcher's if you feel so inclined.
22/04/08 SCUMBAGS MAKE NOISE
Attention all you truckers out there, School for Scumbags is now out on
audio book. Narrated by Dave John (who did the Burglar and Hitman audios),
it is available on CD and cassette, and is published by Clipper Audio. A
link to their site can be found on the School for Scumbags page.
|
18/04/08 CHARLIE KING MAKES HIS DEBUT
Forgive the indulgence, but I'd like to take this opportunity to announce the birth of mine and Jeannie's first son, Charlie Stewart Milo King.
Charlie was born at 5.19am at London's UCH on 09/04/08 and he weighed in at 7lbs 10oz. Just like his old man, he likes to lounge around the house all day while the rest of the world's at work and enjoys a liquid lunch.
I gave him the extra middle name of Milo as I've always liked it and reckoned it was all free advertising space anyway. Still, he was lucky, if the coin had come up heads he could've been called Scumbag. Again, just like his dad. |
18/02/08 HITMAN FILM DEAL STRUCK
Stella Nova Films have optioned the film rights to The Hitman Diaries. Stella Nova producer, Daniel Caltagirone, is keen to shoot the film in Britain and stay faithful to the book. He will be concentrating on the screenplay over the next couple of months and has asked me help develop it.
01/02/2008 CORACLE SNAP UP VAMPIRE FLICK
Coracle Films have optioned the rights to my comic horror vampire screenplay, Reign of Blood (see FORTHCOMING PUBLICATIONS page for details). Coracle producers, Dexter Fletcher and Jason Flemyng are now in talks with a top line production company about finance and development but so far things are looking good. Watch this space.
09/01/08 SCUMBAGS GO TO HOLLYWOOD
DM Productions have optioned the film rights to School for Scumbags. DM producer, David Matalon, is the former President of Columbia Tri-Star. He left Tri-star in the late eighties to produce movies before becoming President and CEO of New Regency in the nineties. He returned to producing in 2007 and "is one of the most well connected guys in Hollywood." Negotiations were held up only slightly by the writers' strike, but the deal's now signed and sealed. Fantastic.
06/11/07 SCUMBAGS MAKE SOME NOISE
WF Howes are to publish School for Scumbags on audio book. WF Howes have already done a great job on The Burglar Diaries and The Hitman Diaries audio books and will publish Scumbags in 2008 on CD, cassette and download.
